Funky Friday - Extreme Chocolate Edition

If you're a chocolate lover with an adventurous palate, you have to try this. Spicy Maya from Chuao Chocolatiers is dark Venezuelan chocolate infused with "A hint of Pasilla chile, cayenne Pepper and cinnamon [to] excite the taste buds."

This is my new chocolat préféré. This will satisfy your chocolate Jones, guaranteed.

This Blogging Life

At some point yesterday, this blog hit its 10,000th visitor (at least since I've been monitoring). I know in the Big Ol' Blogosphere that isn't much, but it's 9,998 more views than I ever imagined I'd get.

I support the concept of Blogging Without Obligation (h/t to materfamilias) but the discipline of trying to write a little bit each day, even if I don't post daily, has been a good exercise for me. Right now, I have so much I want to write about, and far less time to spend on it than I'd like, thanks to those silly things like job and family.

But I wanted to take a moment to thank everyone who reads my random scribblings, and especially those who comment or e-mail me. I like to think of blogging less as a monologue and more as a conversation with fascinating and intelligent people all over the world, sort of like a big cyber cocktail party. And I'd especially like to thank all of the bloggers out there who entertain and inspire me daily.

For Whom the Bell Sleeve Toils

In which Une femme ponders, "for whom do we dress, and what does it mean to look one's best?"

Those of us who regard style as self-expression like to think we dress for ourselves. Yet even so, we are dressing with the understanding that we will be seen and in being seen, convey a bit of who we are.

A couple of recent posts over at The Sartorialist (and some of the follow up comments) really highlighted some of the divergent ways people approach this issue. On his post from Friday, 11/23/07, "A Less Narrow View", Sart says, Often I read comments on this blog like "Shouldn't clothing enhance a woman's form and femininity? " or something of that nature. I think this is a very narrow view of what clothing should/could do for a person. Clothing only needs to keep you protected from the elements, past that what you do with them is your option. This young lady is a great example of self-expression and intellectual dressing.Nothing she is wearing really speaks to WHAT she is physically ( fat or skinny, tall or short, male or female) but her look speaks volumes about WHO she is mentally.

I love this distinction he's making. Do we dress for our bodies, or do we dress for our heads? It's the whole philosophical body/mind duality issue writ in fabric. It's often assumed that women's primary motivation with regard to style and appearance should be to "enhance their form and femininity"* and strive to achieve an appearance that conforms as closely as possible to cultural standards of attractiveness, and many women have subscribed to this concept. (And going to extremes, there are actually people who espouse the notion that it's a woman's obligation to look as attractive as possible.) Watch any daytime talk show or "makeover" shows, or read through most style books and the predominant view is that style is all about the body. Accentuate the positive and eliminate (or camouflage) the negative. The result often is a closet full of clothing devoid of any expression of the personality of the wearer.

At times I think we women (and I include myself in this) can get so hung up on what is "flattering," or that which most closely conforms to the thinner/taller/younger cultural ideal that we inhibit the self-expressionistic component of style**. We all want to look our "best" but that isn't always about what clothing accentuate our waists and makes our legs look two miles long. I grew up believing that the Clothing Prime Directive was One Must Wear Only What Makes One Look Thinner. I still have a tough time letting go of that, even when it means passing on something that otherwise really speaks to me.

I don't think the answer lies totally abandoning those cuts and styles that fit and flatter, but rather that we look at style as serving who we are not just physically but creatively, emotionally and mentally, and that we don't subjugate all sartorial self expression to Pretty Über Alles. Finding that balance is where style becomes art and inspiration. What makes us look "our best" often means incorporating both elements that enhance our physical selves and those which express our personality, even if it would make Tim Gunn cringe.

*Walk around Newport Beach and you see a multitude of women who have subscribed to this viewpoint, a bland cookie-cutter army of extremely slender, mostly blonde, designer-jean-clad trophy-wife-bots. It's a look almost devoid of any individuality.

**Of course, I did get into dog-with-a-bone mode in comments on one of his subsequent posts about why curvy, petite women don't want to wear double-breasted jackets, but I'm nothing if not conflicted.

Fabulous! Festival - Hats, Hats and More Hats!

Hop on over to HATtastic! for the latest edition of the Fabulous! Festival. Miss Janey is the Blogosphere's own Supreme Hat Maven, and she's amassed a compendium of Fabulous hat-related items. If you're looking for inspiration to top off just about any ensemble, this Fabulous! Festival has you covered.

Haute or Not?

Unless you count a couple pairs of shoes and a few handbags, there's nothing in une femme's closet that could by any stretch of the imagination qualify as "designer." Sure, I have items from some of the mass produced lines from Ralph Lauren and Michael Kors, but nothing that couldn't be found at the local Macy's. Even though I could probably afford the odd designer garment these days, I've never thought I had the right body (too short and curvy) or the lifestyle to justify it. With a 10-year-old child, two long-haired dogs, a car that lives outside and only gets washed maybe three times a year, a job that sometimes requires rooting around in dusty storage areas, and hand-eye coordination that is at times less than stellar, I've never really considered purchasing any designer clothing, with two exceptions.

The first is an Hermés scarf. Since I've really started wearing scarves on a regular basis in the last year, I've decided that the right one would definitely add a bit of panache. I may actually pick one up early next year.

The second (don't laugh) is a classic Chanel jacket. Every few months I think about actually searching for one, then the urge seems to subside for a while. But I'd really prefer a vintage version to any of the current iterations I've seen recently, and that's going to take some work to find. I may just have to admire them from afar for a few more years.

What's your take on designer clothing? Worth the price or a big waste? Any designers that you've found to be more wearable than others?

Lipstick Poll

Well, looks like une femme is in the minority on this one.

I absolutely agree with what madeline said in the comments: You have to be quick though - businesslike, nonchalant, no preening, get it right the first time.

Les Chapeaux

Une femme is not a frequent wearer of hats, not out of any lack of desire, but rather because my noggin is quite small, and finding hats that don't make me look like a little girl playing dress up is rather a challenge.

There was one grey wool cloche I found at a vintage/thrift store about 30 (!) years ago that fit me perfectly, looked quite lovely and that I wore until it was so battered it looked like it had been on the losing end of an argument with a Jack Russell terrier. Since then, I've never found a hat that quite emulated its fit and flattery.

There are two extremes where hats are a must pour moi: when it is very cold, and when it is very hot. Just about the only time I'm in the "cold" extreme is when we go skiing, so I'll spare you the ski caps.

Due to a family history of skin cancer, une femme is unflagging in sunscreen application (even on those days when I'm only going in to the office), but for being outside in the midday sun, a broad-brimmed hat is also a must. There is one I use for working in the yard, a simple white cotton affair with a very broad brim adorned with handpainted flowers that I picked up when visiting the Sherman Library & Gardens in Corona Del Mar. The brim is wire-lined and the hat folds up into a small CD-sized pouch. Great for travel to those tropical locales where much time will be spent on the beach or poolside.

But a stiff wide brim isn't always practical. So I've been searching for some other nice choices for shade hats that are packable/crushable, and here's are a few that look promising:

Shady Lady Hats, "Oh La La" $45

(of course the hat won't help if you walk around staring at the sun!!)

Shady Lady Hats, "Diva" $55

Travelsmith Cool Cotton Hat, $29






The rest I've come across so far seem to be of the "adventure" hat, cowboy hat or golf hat variety, but the Shady Lady website seems to have a lot of stylish choices. There's no reason one can't still look trés chic while protecting the skin.

Le Cinéma

Posting will be light the next few days what with all of the cookin' and cleanin' and table settin'.

In the meantime, here are some of une femme's favorite French films, in no particular order:


Diva. Quirky characters and converging plotlines, a gorgeous aria, and some heartbreakingly beautiful cinematography. Even murderous thugs an explosion or two for the guys! (Actually, this is one of my favorite films of all time.)

Cléo de 5 à 7. Cléo waits to get news from her doctor, frets, flirts and roams through Paris. One of those fabulous little "slice of life" films, so quintessentially French.

Subway. Luc Besson wrote and directed, Christopher Lambert and Isabelle Adjani star. A blackmailer, a punk princess, incompetent métro police, and scruffy yet charming subway dwellers intersect.

Amélie. How can anyone not love this movie?

Les Triplettes de Belleville. Don't mess with Grandmere. Or her chien.

Indochine. Another visually stunning movie, set in colonial French Indochina (modern day Vietnam, Laos and Cambodia). Catherine Deneuve stars with Vincent Perez, who is even more gorgeous than some of the scenery.

Le Ballon rouge. Bien sur.

Jean de Florette and Manon des sources. New classics.

Two I haven't seen yet but am adding to my Netflix queue: Jules et Jim and Breathless.

I know there are some I'm forgetting. What are your faves?

Le Maquillage - Les Levres

Picture from: http://www.amazingardornments.com/

Une femme is an admitted lipstick/lipgloss junkie. It's the one bit of maquillage I rarely leave the house without.

Clear or light pink lip gloss (remember "Slicker"?) was the first bit of makeup I was allowed to wear at 14. Throughout my teen years, the trend was toward lighter, sheer colors and red lipstick was seen as something only worn by old movie stars and our grandmothers. Somewhere in my mid-20's, I decided that red lipstick was very sophisticated, and started my search for a shade of red I could wear without feeling either clownish or like my grandmother. I'm still searching.

There was a brief glimmer of hope around 1985 in a shade by Clinique, a gorgeous Chinese red that looked wonderful with my skin tone. But alas, the next time I went to buy it, they'd either discontinued it or changed the formula. I have yet to find another I can wear and feel that my lips belong to the rest of my face.


So in the meantime, I move around from one shade of brownish pink to another (with variations on pale or darker, browner to pinker to peachy/apricot, from very sheer gloss to more saturated sticks). It's hard to find lippies that don't have blue undertones, which make me look sallow, or that aren't the color of liver paté once applied. I have a shoebox-sized container under the bathroom sink of those that looked good in the store, or for a week or so, but ultimately didn't make the cut.

Some recent winners:

T. LeClerc Satin lipstick in Sauvage. This is a nice peachy/cinnamon color that goes on smoothly and isn't drying. Also looks good with a little bit of the T. LeClerc Lip Gloss in Caramel over the top.

Chanel "Le Crayon Levres" pencil in Nude over the entire lip with Glossimer in Glow on top is great for a very natural look.

Saturday I picked up some of the Chanel "Ultra Wear Lip Colour" to test drive. I've had terrible results with every "long-lasting" lip color product I've tried; either they're very drying or they look blotchy after an hour or two or both. This one has two chambers, one for color and the other for a clear gloss that can be re-applied over the color periodically to moisturize and freshen. I'm still getting the hang of it, but seem to get pretty good results if I use the Nude lip pencil, apply the color sparingly (I'm currently using Amber), and let the color set for an entire minute without touching or rubbing my lips together before applying the gloss. Even after eating and drinking, the color seems to mostly stay on (in fact, you need an oil-based cleanser to remove it). I'm going to keep playing with it for a few days before I render a final verdict.

Nars makes some nice lipsticks and glosses. I like their Satin Lipstick in Blonde Venus for a summery-warm nude lip. Nice with their Giza gloss over top.

MAC lipstick in "Charismatic". This is as close to a red that I've found recently that feels wearable.

Some also-rans:

Bobbi Brown lip glosses. These are pretty and stay on, but incredibly sticky any small particles of food, dust, dog hair, etc. will adhere to your lips so stubbornly that you need to remove the gloss completely to get rid of them.

MAC Lipglass. Really nice color and great saturation for a gloss, but I'm getting away from a glassy-glossy look.

MAC Viva Glam lipstick: just a little too purple for me.

Here's a question for you (and une femme's first poll): reapplying lipstick in public, oui ou non? My very prim-and-proper little grandmother used to pull our her compact and tube and reapply her lipstick while still at the table after a lunch or dinner out. I've never had a problem with (PDLA) Public Displays of Lipstick Application, but I've read recently that this is considered trés gauche. I've posted the poll over to the right, so here's your chance to weigh in on this critical issue for our time. ;-) And if you have recommendations for a warm based red lipstick that is moisturizing, let me know in the comments.

Identity, Style and Inspiration

While une femme's sense of self and style these days is not quite as all over the map as I intimated in the Dolly Parton post, I have done my share of floundering. But style and identity have always been linked in my mind, and I've never been quite able to totally separate "who am I?" from "how do I appear?" *

The floundering part I partially blame the era in which I grew up, and some of the monumental shifts that occurred during my formative years. By the time I was twenty, I'd seen style shifts from the Jackie-Kennedy-suits-pearls-and-white-gloves or movie-stars-in-leopard-coats, to Beatle-boots-Beatle-everything, to Mod-GoGo-Boots-mini-skirts (think Laugh-In) to dirty-hippies-in-jeans-beads-and-huaraches, to granny-dresses-and-earth-shoes to satin disco pants.

And real life women whose styles I admired and wanted to emulate spanned just about as great a range. There was the fashion designer friend of my parents in the early 60's who I can't picture now but remember that she seemed very glamorous to my five-year-old eyes, and who taught me how to design dresses for my paper dolls. There was the Swedish photographer my parents hired when I was ten to take our portraits, who dressed very simply in turtlenecks and hand woven ponchos and took our pictures with a Hasseblad and inspired me to become a photographer. There was the neighbor's daughter hired to babysit us, who was an honest-to-god San Francisco hippie, wore real Mexican serapes and silver jewelry, went barefoot and smoked cigars and introduced me to FM radio, (which at the time totally changed my life). There was my college roommate who had lovely silk/satin pants and Chinese jackets that she loaned me. I wanted to copy the style of each of those women. I wanted to be most of those women. I tried on persona's and then cast them off so many costumes in a stuffy dressing room.

But the style upheavals of those years were indicative of greater shifts in culture, values, and roles and expectations for women. A book I read a few years ago, Appetites: Why Women Want by Caroline Knapp, though it was primarily about anorexia and eating disorders, also touched on the idea of the overwhelming number of choices that young women have today as opposed to a couple of generations ago, and how it can make them turn back in on themselves and develop eating disorders or other self-destructive behaviors. Women of my age and socio-economic status were right on the cusp of this change. Most of our mothers were housewives and and assumed that we, their daughters, would be as well. But the women's movement of the 60's and 70's changed all that, and while the prior lack of choices had felt stultifying, the sudden broad scope of possibilities felt a bit like being on the open sea with no maps or navigational abilities. Not that I'd ever want to go back, mind you. Watch a few episodes of Mad Men if you need reminding.

That's why I envy people who seem to have the kind of blinding clarity and a certain integrity about who they are and how they want to look, whereas I seem to sort of stumble on it by accident. When I wrote about dressing-from-the-inside-out, it was one of those days where I felt I had hit the right note of alignment between self and style. I'm getting a better sense of what that means for me, in this body, at my age. But it doesn't mean that I still don't vacillate and question and let myself be influenced (sometimes too much) by something I see on someone else. That balance between consistency and currency requires a balance between trusting one's own judgement about what works, and staying open to new possibilities. Still negotiating a broad and changeable ocean, I may not have a map, but do have a compass.

(*While I realize that "identity" is far deeper than how we appear, I'm referring to the "how we present ourselves to the world" aspect. )

And the Winner Is....

Oh la la! Your answers were all formidable! I couldn't decide! Seriously, I wish I had enough copies to send to each of you. So I put everyone's name in a hat and drew. And the winner is...
Kai Jones!!!

Kai, if you'll send me an e-mail with your address and I'll get the book in the mail to you. Congratulations!

Funky Friday - Druid Edition

Woad not included.

Fantasy Style

In a day or two, I'm going to expand on my Dolly post a bit, and talk about some of my real life style influences (and quite the crazy quilt it is) but here are some of my Fantasy Style influences, if money and body weren't an issue:

The Hepburns (Katherine and Audrey)





Juliette Binoche's character in Chocolat

(Googling, this was the only picture I could find from the movie that shows anything below her neck, but I couldn't bear to crop out Johnny Depp. ;-) Her shoes were great too.)

And even more recently, this pic of Carolina Herrera from The Sartorialist really resonated...

(Anyone know where I can find a skirt like that? Some might say this is boring, but to me it's fabulous: the simplicity, the sophistication, the POCKETS!)

Do It on Purpose

Miss Janey's delightful post about The CMA's over at HATtastic! brought to mind this quote by Dolly Parton, which has always been one of my favorites:

“Find out who you are and do it on purpose.”

What a wonderfully distilled personal style manifesto! Someday I'll get the first part down, and then I figure the second part will be a piece of cake.

(Just when I think I've figured out who I am and how to express that style-wise, BAM, I'll see someone wearing something fabulous that's 180 degrees from what I've been doing, and decide "I want to wear THAT!" It's a state of perpetual freekin identity crisis, I tell you.

I wonder if Dolly ever wakes up some mornings and decides she wants to cut her hair short and wear more Armani?)

Fabulous! Festival - Travel Edition

Une femme is delighted to be hosting this go-round of the Fabulous! Festival. The theme for this Festival is Travel, and we received Fabulous submissions on many different facets of this topic. So many in fact, that we weren't able to feature them all, but we thank everyone who submitted.

Meg at All About Appearances tells us in Travelling in Style why appearances are as important as comfort, and how to have both. In fact, check out her entire series on Travelling in Style; there's beaucoup des conseils to keep you looking Fabulous on the move.

Fabulously Broke in the City gives some excellent advice about what footwear to bring and what to leave home in Travelling: Shoes, and helps bring out your inner McGyver in Things To Use in a Pinch When Travelling. And if you have trouble zipping your suitcase every time you pack, check out Travelling: Clothes to help pare down to essentials.

Icy at Individual Chic eschews boring touristy khaki and recommends some stylish Travel Wear.

D. Dottrey at STYLEnosh helps out with the number one travel mistake, overpacking. I'm going to bookmark LESSONS FROM OVERPACKING and review before our next trip!

Ashe Mischief at dramatis personae shares a recent Travel Trauma, and gives some great packing advice to avoid just such misfortunes.

Host Bee at Busy Bee Lifestyle offers some great no-nonsense tips about What To Wear on a Vacation to Paris. Oh la la, we love Paris!

Speaking of Paris, materfamilias has a nose for shoes like nobody's business. In "My Shoes Wednesdays" she features two pairs that she picked up in Paris, here and here, and waxes eloquent about travel, Paris, and the allure of Louboutins.

Shoes, teacups or whatever unique trinket strikes your fancy, souvenirs are a great way to bring back memories of your journeys. Shopping for them can be half the fun, and needn't break the bank. At Intelligent Travel, National Geographic Travel staffers reveal their favorite thrift stores around the world in Thrifty Souvenirs.

Not everyone is a Happy Wanderer. Some are afraid of flying, others have trouble sleeping in a strange bed. Tina Su at Think Simple. Be Decisive offers 3 Tips to Calm Anxiety which can help calm the mind and allow one to better enjoy the journey.

Catching a live performance is often on the agenda when travelling especially when visiting cities like New York and Las Vegas. Ruth at Buy Outside the Box says Cirque De Soleil is formidable, Art In Motion in fact.

On other topics:

Dealing with breast cancer or any other serious illness is a challenging and life-altering journey. Karen at Makeup and Beauty Blog shares Makeup and Beauty Tips For Breast Cancer Patients: Staying Beautiful Inside and Out!


Miss Janey at HATtastic is hosting the next Fabulous! Festival and the topic is--Surprise!--Hats.

Miss Janey sez:
"It's all about the hats this edition! Do you wear them for fun or
only for practical reasons? Do you hate hats and refuse to wear them?
Do you like hats, but think you can't wear them? Do you have advice
for people who think they can't wear them? You're invited to submit
all your fabulous posts on hats, including about church hats, hat
tricks, mad hatters, etc., etc."

Deadline for submissions is November 23rd, and posts for consideration may be submitted here.

To those of you who are travelling for the upcoming Thanksgiving holidays or for any other reason, I wish you Safe Travels!

Diamonds Really Can Be a Girl's Best Friend

Victorian bracelet from BELADORA.com.

One of my readers has asked me to pass this along:

Our Estate Jewelry Website will be donating 2% of our online sales over the Holiday Season to the Lynne Cohen Foundation which funds groundbreaking research to support the survival rates for women with ovarian cancer. This cause is very important because the survival rates for ovarian cancer are shockingly low. We would like to increase public awareness of this and hopefully do for ovarian cancer what the Susan B. Komen Foundation has done for breast cancer. Please help us by telling your readers about BELADORA.COM and the LynneCohenFoundation.org.

I've never purchased anything from Beladora, but I perused the website yesterday and they have some really gorgeous and unique pieces. I love jewelry with history. If you're looking for something sparkly and special, please do go check them out.

Funky Friday - Are You HIGH???* Edition

This week, Instyle.com picked this as their Look of the Day. This isn't a dress, it's a bad K-Mart shower curtain left over from the 80's. And provides solid proof once again that broad, horizontal stripes do no one any favors.

*Actually, judging from some of the ensembles promoted at Instyle.com, I'm certain there's some serious glue-sniffing going on in the shoe closet over there.

Following Our Instincts

"Look at me, they said. And I did."

This quote from Linda Grant's blog, The Thoughtful Dresser (which has become one of my daily reads), really gets down to the bones of what this style thing is all about.

To stand out or to blend in? It's the sartorial equivalent of the Fight or Flight response. That might sound a bit extreme, but being on display has rarely felt safe to me, and fear has informed much of my style. I stood out in ways I never intended, first as a chubby child whose appearance was constantly critiqued by family and then as a young woman without sufficient means to wear anything other than what I could find in my size in our smallish town's thrift stores. The Greek chorus in my head most frequently when browsing through the racks was chanting "you can't wear that" and (sometimes simultaneously) "you can't afford that." So my overarching desire, if not to hide, was to blend in, to wear what the other thinner, wealthier girls were wearing.

There were my defiant times, when I wore neon lime green hi-top sneakers and gold lamé cat-eye sunglasses, and being different was a big fuckyou to those who were never going to accept me anyway. It felt good, but it was still about rebellion, about reacting against the dominant style paradigm, rather than expressing something truly my own.

My "sweet spot" outfit from a couple days ago had an element of hiding about it. It was generic, neutral, nothing about it in particular inviting anyone to look. (But the ankle boots...there is something about boots that feels very cool and powerful that I like, and have always liked about wearing boots.) Dressing this way is following my instincts, but instincts tend to be about preservation, not about expression or fulfillment. I'm not satisfied with just preservation anymore.

To be able to go out into the world saying, "look at me," and not from a standpoint of seeking approval or fearing judgment, that's a mighty powerful stance. I'm not there yet, but I'm working on it.

The Mutton Roundup

If this is mutton, sign me up.

Photo: http://www.exposay.com/

Seems this is a hot topic these past few days.

Linda Grant at The Thoughtful Dresser says Fie! on the "Mutton Monitors" (and dons a lovely leather rocker jacket), and today argues in favor of dressing with attitude. Linda says,

"The point about these three was that they understood that the parade has most certainly not gone by. None of them looked ridiculous, they had elegance and distinction and above all, a strong sense of personal style. You understood at once that their clothes mattered to them, because they understood why clothes matter.

Look at me, they said. And I did."

Materfamilias asks "Who wants to be a lamb anyway?" and makes a case for developing an individual style that incorporates both classical and whimsical elements.

Meg at Faking Good Breeding takes Patricia Fields to task for putting SJP in getups that look like "she fell into the dumpster behind Forever 21" and makes the point that just because one can wear something, doesn't mean one should.

I've been reading "It's So You: 35 Women Write about Personal Expression Through Fashion & Style", edited by Michelle Tea, and Laura Fraser makes a great point about developing an individual style that is never "out" because it was never "in" in the first place. It seems to me that women who continue to look stylish as they age and don't fade into the woodwork are the ones who have figured this out.

Hitting the Style Sweet Spot

Do you ever have one of those days when you just sort of dress from instinct, don't put a lot of thought into it, but when you look in the mirror, you realize what you're wearing feels so totally like you? Today was one of those days for me, and tells me that perhaps I've been overthinking this style thing, and letting myself get too influenced by what I see on The Sartorialist or style blogs/books or other people.


Women our age are constantly warned against falling into a style rut. We're told that we need to keep updating our closets and our look. Makeover shows hawk transformation: the "after" woman not only looks more stylish, but also has more confidence and assertiveness. But I often wonder, when the look they're given is so drastically different than where they started (especially if it requires more maintenance) how many actually sustain these changes over time? Sure, we need to push the style envelope at times, but do we need to totally discard those tried-and-true elements that feel like second skin? And how much of a style "rut" is actually a rut, and how much is a clearly defined, consistent style?


Or can we use those dressing-from-the-inside-out days to help discover our own style foundations and build upon them? What are the elements of what I wore today that feel so right for me? Minimalism, a neutral color scheme (black and grey), comfort, boots, nothing fussy or frilly. While everyone needs some variety, sometimes at our age, we need to edit more than we need to append, and getting down to our style core is essential to editing wisely. (I think I feel a major closet purge coming on...)


One of the things that comes up frequently about French women's style, even more than their talent for clever tying of scarves, is that it's so integrated with who they are. They don't radically change their style from year to year or even decade to decade, they don't have closetsful of this year's trend, and they aren't afraid to wear a favorite item repeatedly. They seem to be comfortable with this kind of instinctive dressing; it's not that they don't put in some effort, it's that they don't put in too much.

Temperatures Dropping in Hell

Picture: www.adclassix.com

Une femme has been a self-proclaimed Coffee Snob™ since discovering the world of fresh roasted beans at the tender young age of 17. For decades now, I've been a purist when it comes to buying whole beans, grinding myself, brewing either in a drip machine with a gold filter or in a French Press, or hauling out the espresso machine when the mood strikes. Even when I was broke, I bought the best beans I could afford and performed my grinding/brewing rituals daily.

But technology has overtaken me, and the siren's call to simplify, simplify, simplify is just too strong to resist. I'm tired of grinding, measuring, cleaning up the grounds that somehow always seem to scatter all over the countertops, of washing and prepping my coffeemaker the night before so I don't have to at 5:30 in the morning, or having to clean out the French press (scooping the wet grounds into the trash, washing the pot) each time I use it. But I'm not tired of good coffee.

I'm seriously considering purchasing a Nespresso. Despite the fact that other coffee snobs I know have happily succumbed to Nespressism, I've resisted for a number of reasons, not the least of which being the fact that I am known in my family as The Coffee Whisperer. I can coax a pretty good to great pot of coffee out of just about any machine and beans, and derive a great deal of satisfaction from this talent (one of my few). Going auto feels like cheating somehow. That, my lingering knee-jerk avoidance of Nestlé products (a residual from the 1980's boycott due to the baby formula travesty), and the fact that with these machines you're locked into buying the Nespresso coffee capsules has kept me from exploring this option. But yesterday, I got a taste, thanks to the Nespresso lady at Bloomingdales, and I'm willing to be converted. Bloomie's is offering special pricing right now, plus these machines will be discounted another 10% during the Friends and Family sale starting later this week, so I think I'm going to take the plunge.

I've been hunting down reviews online and they seem to be mostly positive. Anyone reading have any experience (positive or negative) with these machines?

N'Oubliez Pas...

"Thank goodness for my PDA!"

Une femme is giving away a copy of the fabulous book, Parisiennes: A Celebration of French Women. To enter the contest, leave a comment here before midnight on November 15.

Also, the next Fabulous! Festival on November 12 will be hosted by moi, and the theme is Travel Style. If you would like to participate, please submit your entry ici. Deadline for submissions is next Friday, Nov. 9.

Investments in Footwear

Whenever my husband refers to me as "Imelda," (he who cannot comprehend why anyone would need more than 3-4 pairs of shoes) I remind him that a) I have about 3000 fewer shoes than Mrs. Marcos, and b) it's not a closet full of shoes, it's a portfolio!

Seriously, though, a carefully chosen shoe can be a great style investment that when amortized will yield a very low cost-per-wear. Take for example, a pair of Stuart Weitzman ankle boots, quite similar to these that I purchased two years ago. I've worn them almost daily during the cooler months for two winters now, heading into a third. They show very little wear with periodic polishing, and still look current and fabulous. They were not inexpensive, yet I feel now that they were a great value, and I've never had a moment of buyer's regret.

While I do feel in general that when it comes to shoes, you get what you pay for more often than not, (or don't get what you don't pay for), I have had a few pairs of very inexpensive shoes that served me quite well. Back in my 20's, there was that pair of leopard print Aerolsoles loafers (barely worn!) that I found at a thrift store and wore almost nonstop for about three years until they finally disintegrated. More recently, a pair of beige Ann Taylor suede loafers, on January sale for around $25 have been my go-to shoes to walking dogs and puttering around the house for a few years now. These days they look like something the cat dragged in, but still are comfortable and structurally sound.

One factor that prevents me from becoming a serious shoe-holic is that I have a very high comfort threshhold. I have a high arch/instep, and thanks to going through a pregnancy at 40, a much wider foot than previously. Plus, arthritis in my hip means that I need to keep the heels low (2" or under most days). Many gorgeous shoes that I admire from afar I either cannot squeeze my duck feet into, or feel like Hell's own torment once I stand up and try to walk. I refuse to wear shoes that hurt. Period. There is only so far this femme will go in service of style.

So how do you spot a Blue Chip shoe investment opportunity, and avoid the Junk Bonds? At time it feels more like an art than a science, but what it boils down to is this: hit four out of five and you're in AAA territory. Three out of five and you're at least not pouring money down the drain.

• Comfort - they fit, you can walk in them, you don't get blisters, they don't pinch, or rub or cause loss of circulation if you have to stand for more than 15 minutes, soles are flexible. Bonus points if they're comfortable without hosiery of any kind.


• Workmanship - high quality materials, even stitching, rubber heel tips, evenly dyed leather or fabric, buckles/hardware/ornamentation are all firmly attached and without glue overflow, an overall appearance that is not shoddy.


• Trancendance - classic timeless design. This usually means a simple, more unadorned style. You don't have to ignore the trends altogether, but be careful of "It" shoes. Skip the Tory Burch ballet flats and go for Ferragamo Audrey's. (If you must bow to trend, get these in Chili Patent...TDF and when those Reva's are so last year, these will still look cool.)


• Versatility - Do they dress up or down? Can you wear them with at least five ensembles in your closet? Une femme is a fan of neutrals, but a red, green or a leopard print is also quite adaptable.


• Love - did these shoes haunt your dreams until you went back to the store and plunked down the plastic? Do you still love them now that they are sitting in your closet waiting for their debut? Do they bring forth your most confident self?

I didn't mention price. What I may consider a pricey pair of shoes may be "mid-range" for someone else, and visa-versa. I do agree in principle with The Manolo's assertion that one should save up for a few pairs of Superfantastic shoes, but I know that sometimes you need to leave the house, and don't yet have enough in the piggy bank for the Zanotti's or Louboutins.

Brands that I've found have a good selection of Investment-worthy Shoes: Stuart Weitzman (also feature lots of styles in Wide widths), Salvatore Ferragamo (though they don't offer Wide widths on their website, their boutiques carry most of the popular styles in wide; you can call and order), Franco Sarto (more moderately priced but well made, comfortable and I've found they wear like iron).

Not every shoe purchase has to be based on Investment. Sometimes that open-toed purple suede number with the bows is just what the doctor ordered. And you may be surprised; a pair of shoes that you LOVE although they don't seem practical may end up getting more wear than you'd think.

Phone-it-in Friday

Well, nothing funky enough for Funky Friday has presented itself this week. I'm working on a few longer posts about all of our favorite girly stuff (Shoes! Bags! Parfum!) that should be finished in the next few days.

In the meantime, in homage to The Manolo, here's what une femme is:

Listening to. This is just phenomenal work, great collaborations.

Reading. Fun!

Listening to. Une femme has been a fan of Creedence Clearwater and Fogerty since back in the day, and am happy to see him back out there with some new material.

Whew

Resting up from another fantabulous Halloween. Had another 300+ trick-or-treaters visit. We recruited les freres de l'époux to come over and help hand out candy, and a good time was had by all.

This year, pumpkins a l'Opéra, complete with Puccini sound track:

Moral of the story: hang onto those old Renaissance Faire costumes.