Bonne année!

Bonne année!! by deja pseu on Polyvore.com

Une femme wishes everyone the Happiest and Healthiest of New Years!

I'd like to take a moment to thank all of you who read and/or comment on posts at Une femme d'un certain age, and those who have linked from your own blogs or websites. What started off as a small experiment almost three years ago has become a wonderful way to connect with people all over the world and be a part of an amazing online community. I truly appreciate your comments, thoughts and support.

We're hosting a small impromptu soirée this evening for immediate family to celebrate the recent marriage (which took place on a coral reef in the middle of the South Pacific, no less!) of my brother-in-law. Hooray, an excuse to dress up a bit and pull out the table linens and silver!

Have a lovely New Year's celebration, whatever that looks like to you!
~

Une femme recommends...

Bare Minerals Skin Rev-er Upper, $21.*

A couple of years ago, I'd noticed that my skin seemed to be getting duller and the texture a bit rougher. I tried exfoliation scrubs, but no longer had noticeable results. I had a mild glycolic peel from a facialist for the first time a little over a year ago, and was really impressed with the improvement in clarity and texture of my skin. Then in June when I had an appointment with a facialist on our Alaska cruise, she recommended using a product nightly that included some glycolic acid.

I didn't have an easy time finding one initially. I purchased some products online recommended by readers, but didn't see the results I'd hoped for. I found this product almost by accident. I had stopped into the Bare Escentuals shop to check out the mineral makeup again during one of my fits of pique with a current foundation, and the sales associate recommended this product. At home reading the ingredients, I realized it had both glycolic and salicylic acids. At first I used twice daily (mornings under 50+ sunscreen) and really saw an improvement within a couple of weeks. I now use this product nightly as a serum before my moisturizer. If you have sensitive skin, I'd suggest trying on a small area first, as there's a not-quite-a-sting feeling when you first apply.

I've spent more on skincare but rarely have found a product that I'm as impressed with as this one.

*Note: the Bare Escentuals website refers to this as a "primer," but I've found that I still need a silicone-based primer on top of my moisturizer and sunscreen for best results.

~

Stripes Ahoy!

Une femme has been a bit obsessed with the marinière top lately.

Coco Chanel made it chic, and the look has endured despite those sometimes tricky horizontal stripes . But according to this article from the Guardian, one need not fear them (thanks, Rubiatonta!). Most of the traditional marinière tops have the narrow stripes that create the "ladder" effect which according to Imogen, will draw the eye up and down. Those of us with more curves than Mademoiselle above might want to wear these tops out rather than tucked in.
As with any iconic item, it's best to avoid a head-to-toe classic ensemble, which can look stodgy. Mix the classic pieces with some contemporary or whimsical touches to keep it fresh and easygoing.

Classic With A Twist - Marinière by deja pseu featuring J Crew

Whether you call it a marinière, fisherman's top or Breton stripe, the look is classic and options in many styles and price ranges are available. (Click on Shopstyle images below for more info.)

When it comes to any iconic item itself, une femme generally believes in sticking to the most traditional colors and patterns (in this case white or cream with a navy or black stripe). However if one is assez mince (as their sizing is très petite), the brown and grey Petit Bateu version shown in the Polyvore below is an interesting option. (Click on image for more info.)

Les Marinières by deja pseu featuring Calypso

And for the real deal:

Meridien fishing shirt from Brittany Boutique, EU 38.00.

(Anti-seasickness patch not included.)

~

Sunday Music Corner

Turn your speakers up to 11.

This is my favorite cut from one of my favorite bands of the late 70's, Brand X.

I was lucky enough to catch them in concert in '79 at either the Roxy or The Whiskey (went to many concerts back then, some smoking of illicit substances may have been involved). Though Robin Goodsall is an amazing guitarist, the member of the band I was most impressed with was Percy Jones, the bassist. He played as though he had ten fingers on each hand, just incredible. (See some of his subsequent work here with band "Tunnels.")

And the drummer? That's Phil Collins, before his musical career descended into the Seventh Circle of Pop Schlok in the 80's. Guess a guy's gotta eat (and have a country house or two), but most people aren't aware that he has some serious chops as a percussionist.

Here's a live version, unfortunately pretty crappy sound and video, but you get the idea.

~

Merry and Bright

As requested, some of the motorized Christmas decorations in our neighborhood. (Apologies that some of the pics are a bit out of focus, was trying to avoid using the flash. )


The hat-tipping snowman is a popular item, and I counted at least three in a four block radius.

This house was really the piece-de-resistance of motorized decoration:

Both of the snowmen below spin around:

The reindeer moves his head back and forth:

And this one...wow! The elf in the smokestack spins around, and the big peppermint wheel turns. And some of the lights flash.

Do your neighbors go all out to decorate for the holidays?

~

More Cheer...

This is probably one of the most fun Christmas songs ever written. Alas, it was released just a couple of years too early to have its own music video...the lights will have to do.

(Every time I hear this song it takes me back to walking through the snow to the WaWa in Princeton...)
~

Merry Christmas!

May your heart be full of cheer and goodwill. God Bless Us, Every One.

Une femme will be back with new posts next week.

Une femme recommends...

Not in time for Christmas, but...

This navy tuxedo jacket from J. Crew is on sale for $99! (I'm looking at you, Belle and La Belette Rouge!) Perfect to throw over that party dress for a chilly New Year's Eve!

Confession: I bought the same one in black a few weeks ago during another J. Crew sale, and while it's not a YSL Le Smoking, the fit is flattering and it's a well made piece.
~

Housekeeping

I'm going to be polishing the blog a bit over the long weekend, including tidying up my blogroll. So if you've added une femme to your blogroll but I've not yet reciprocated, please give me a link to your blog in comments and I'll correct my egregious omission.
~

Catalogue des Blogs

It was a busy weekend chez femme.

Our next door neighbor had passed away on the 9th, peacefully in her sleep, a few months shy of her 100th birthday. Saturday was her funeral and the huge family gathering that followed at her house. She was a sweet and lovely lady, and we will miss her.

Yesterday was our extended family Chanukah get-together at MIL's (who makes the best latkes evah!) I know, Friday was the actual last day of the official observance, but this was the only day that we could get the whole clan together.

So for your reading enjoyment, some favorites from the last few days:

A Femme d'un Certain Age has rounded up some Dernier Moments gift suggestions (including some by yours truly) here, here, and here.

LPC at ~Privilege gets the lowdown on cashmere selection and care, in an interview with The Cashmere Queen.

That's Not My Age chronicles the Return of Posh (hint, it's not referring to a Spice Girls reunion)

Une femme is now seriously craving a Breton stripe top, and the figure to wear it.

Audi, guest posting at Already Pretty, says "Yes You Can Wear Hats!!!"

And Sal shows us some fabulous Jewelry Makeovers.

~

Natty Nate

From a moderately pretentious but amusing NYT article:

Today the well-off 55-year-old is likely to be the worst-dressed man in the room, wearing a saggy T-shirt and jeans. The cash-poor 25-year-old is in a natty sport coat and skinny tie bought at Topman for a song. Young men are embracing the “Mad Men” elements of style in a way that the older men never did, still don’t and just won’t.

(The accompanying slide show is fun, though.)

I have yet to observe these herds of suit-and-tie clad young men here in LA. Most of the younger men I'm seeing are still dressing in one of the following styles: generic Gap, modified hip-hop, quasi-punk, sports-team-jersey or homeless surfer. Perhaps it's yet another example of an NYT writer observing a trend among his/her friends and projecting it as a broad cultural movement? (See also "Opt Out Revolution, The")

I'd actually love to see more men who dress like Thom.

~

Highbrow

It seems that une femme has company in the brow-challenged arena. From the NY Times:
Overplucking has become so entrenched a faux pas that a raft of eyebrow powders and repair kits now exist to help disguise mistakes till the hair grows back. Some high-end eyebrow shapers, who charge $25 to $120 a session, have become known for their ability to steer the skimpy-browed to a fuller look. To say nothing of the fact that an increasing number of hair transplant surgeries are done to resurrect brows tamed into oblivion.

My own brow tragedy dates back to high school. In the 70's when the Jean Harlow style brow was enjoying a resurgence, a friend's mother persuaded me to allow her pluck my scraggly (though not bushy) brows. The result was a single line of hairs barely visible above each eye that never fully grew back. Add thinning as a result of the ageing process, and the result is brows that need some help. You won't see me signing up for more extreme measures though, especially transplants, which entail using hair from the scalp, arms or pubic area. (?!?!?) o_O

I use either a powdered eyeshadow or a soft pencil to subtly fill in the sparse areas. My brows will never be full and dramatic again, but at least I can avoid looking like an alien.

Please, mes petites, learn from my mistake. Don't overpluck...they may not grow back.

At the opposite end of the spectrum, here's a little gratuitous brow-on-man action, just for gorgeous and award-winning blogger Wendy B.

~

Foulard de la semaine

Here is the "Les Toits de Paris" (Rooftops of Paris) carré again, this time worn with my olive green Talbot's sweater. I finally worked out how to tie this one so the mice are visible.

The pictures make the scarf look more bright orange than it really is. It's more of a rust color. You can see more accurate color here.
~

Anchors aweigh

I don't know how the Totally Wrong Sweater survived my last closet purge. It was one of those items I'd purchased at tremendous markdown, thinking it would be a Classic™ because of the color and style (camel, v-neck cashmere). It was "good on paper" but never fit quite right: too long, too tight across the hips, but I'd kept it year after year. The only thing it did fit was an aspirational mental image of myself. Evertime I put it on, I'd take it off within a few minutes, refold it, and put it back on the high shelf with the cedar blocks. And then I'd think about how I needed to lose weight.

Last night, I pulled this sweater down off the shelf again and put it on, thinking it would be a comfortable and cozy choice for lounging at home. Immediately, I could feel the snugness around my hips. I looked in the mirror, and really took note of just how badly this sweater fit, how frumpy it made me look (and feel !!), and the tangible drag it had on my mood and self-image. I took it off, folded it up, and put it in my to-be-donated pile.

Do you have any of those deadweight items still lurking in your closet? What holds you back from getting rid of them?
~

Makeover Workshop!

Saturday I attended one of Brian's Holiday Makeover Workshops. The weather outside was frightful, but Brian had set up a comfortable, well lit and well equipped space. I've had countless makeovers done by cosmetic counter sales associates and makeup artists, but what this workshop really provided that those didn't was a much more hands-on, how-to, personalized approach. Five women were in attendance, all d'un certain age, which was great as Brian was able to focus on what works for us. Yes Virginia, you really can wear eyeliner after fifty, and the technique Brian showed us is super easy, foolproof and quick enough to do every day, and yields subtle but dramatically eye-enhancing results. I'm an eyeliner convert!! We started with some simple daytime looks, then added some glam for evening. I'd fully intended to stop and take pictures at each stage, but was having so much fun I forgot. So without further ado...

Before:

Yowza! Can you say "sun damage"?

After:

All glammed up and ready for a night on the town. Alas, our babysitter was sick, so it was an early dinner with the whole family at the local Mexican place and then home to watch a movie on cable.

If you're living in or plan to visit the LA area and are interested in attending one of Brian's workshops, you can e-mail him at brian (at) makeoverworkshop (d0t) com.

~

Happy Chanukah!

~

A Face In The Crowd

plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose




I hadn't seen this movie in ages, and watched it on TCM again the other night. The messages about the media and cults of personality are every bit as relevant today as when the movie was made in 1957.
~

Blog-o-Rama!

Daffodil Planter just celebrated her first blogaversary! If you are an avid gardener, or if (comme moi) you dream of someday being an avid gardener, you must check out this witty and informative blog.

Duchesse at Passage des Perles adds her own thought-provoking observations to the "letting oneself go" discussion.

Just in time for holiday party season, A Femme d'un Certain Age in her ongoing "virtual shopping" series shows how she and her friend Edith remix those fabulous items already lurking dans leurs armoires to create festive and updated ensembles.

La Belette Rouge finds her Ruby Slippers. Her little dog approves.

WendyB unveils her newest, astonishingly gorgeous design, the Virginia Woolf Whistle.

Belle de Ville tempts us with some fabulous vintage pearl pieces.

And Imogen at Inside Out Style shows us how to choose and coordinate necklaces with tops.

~

Foulard de la semaine

"A Walk In The Park," one of my perennial faves.

~

Laissez-faire

Of all the judgements that are passed on women's appearances, the one that irks une femme most is "she's really let herself go."

Perhaps because I've been on the receiving end of this accusation during times when I was really struggling (to lose weight, or dress decently on a shoestring budget, or balance a demanding job and young child with special needs), I'm a bit sensitive when it comes to those words.
Perhaps it's because of the moralizing subtext indicating that sins of gluttony and sloth are made manifest. Perhaps it's because of the erroneous belief that all aspects of our appearance are ultimately within our control.
But truly, I have yet to meet the woman who has truly "let herself go," this mythical creature who just decides one day that she just doesn't give a fig anymore about her appearance, about the state of her home, about her work, and suddenly is perfectly content to sit on the sofa all day eating bonbons. If you scratch the surface of someone who used to dress to the nines but now is seen shlepping about in sweats and greasy hair, I'll bet you find someone whose life has taken a turn that has her feeling overwhelmed and out of control. Perhaps it's illness, job loss, depression, or sudden demands such as care taking for a sick family member. Perhaps we should ask how things are going for her, rather than assume she doesn't care anymore.
And I've also heard those "letting herself go" assessments levied against women whose only transgressions are showing some natural signs of ageing. Weight gain, wrinkles, softening jawlines, greying hair...the balance between a willingness to invest time and money to hold back the visible manifestations of passing years and a desire to just enjoy and experience whatever finite amount of time we've been granted is one we continuously negotiate. None of us will retain our youthful beauty forever; we each have to decide what level of effort put toward our appearance enhances or diminishes our lives.
Personally, I can't imagine the day that I won't want to dress well, but I can hope to achieve a level of acceptance where a few extra pounds no longer drive me to distraction, and a few more wrinkles don't make a dent in my self-esteem, and nothing stops me from living life to the fullest.
So can we retire this outdated expression?
~

Monday, already?

And we're bracing for some serious rain today.

On Saturday we braved the crowds and lines, and saw this:



Very. Good. Movie.

It was well written, with some great dialog and complex characters. Funny, sad and intelligent, it's a story with heart that never allows itself to descend into syrupy sentimentality, a mix that's too rare in movies these days.
~

Une femme recommends...

Acme reusable grocery bag, $5.95 That feeling of moral superiority, priceless.

Une femme's green intentions are good. Last year, we bought several of those large reusable grocery bags sold at markets ($1 each, conveniently displayed right next to the checkout line) to carry our goodies home. But then they remained behind in the closet where they were stashed after we put our groceries away, or in the trunk of my car where, intentions aside, I invariably forgot them until I was at the register with my cartful of food halfway rung up.

Before our Paris trip I ordered a couple of these Acme bags online, as we'd planned to do some shopping at outdoor markets. I didn't use them much in Paris, but since I've been home have found them indispensable. They weigh nothing, fold up neatly into a self-pocket, a size that's easily accommodated in my purse where they are always available. When they ask "paper or plastic?" you can chirpily reply, "neither, I have my own" and do a small part for the environment.

~

Extensions Granted

Project Growout proceeds apace. No, I still have not purchased a tripod, which accounts for the slightly out-of-focus, taken-in-the-mirror portraits, though I have naught to blame for the dorky expressions save my own anxiety in front of the lens.

Duchesse's great post about avoiding stylists with Gran Goggles prompted me to share the lastest in my own hair saga.

Next to my weight, my hair is the feature I obsess over the most frequently. It's fine, thin, mostly straight, often described by stylists as "baby hair." It goes flat without layers, looks stringy once it hits a certain length, and is generally wimpy.

I'd been growing out the pixie from a couple years ago, and was at the point where I needed a fresh pair of eyes to address a cut that was veering dangerously close to Ruth Anne territory. I also wanted to soften the color and add highlights, which nobody does better than Brian, so last Wednesday I found myself back in his chair. What I was going for color-wise was this:

(The end result was a bit redder as you can see above, but my hair tends to take color that way. It will probably take a few coloring sessions to tone the red down.) Brian cut some layers into my chin-length bob to add some dimension and movement. He then suggested that I try some extensions to add some volume, not length, to the sides. ("Just a few.") I was a bit hesitant, but as it's always been my impossible dream to have thick, luxuriant hair, I crossed my fingers and gave the go-ahead. The effect is subtle but I can definitely see the difference. The strands of hair extensions are bonded to a very thin strand of my own hair with a small piece of something that looks like wax, which is heated with something that looks like a curling iron (but does not burn) to adhere. The attachments are secured to the underneath layers, and so are totally invisible.

I drove home, my brain dancing with Sugar Plum fantasies about growing my hair out past shoulder length with a little boost from these Hirsute Helpers.

One week in, and I'm still on the fence. I'm not used to the feel of these. Forget about running one's fingers through one's hair...it's easy to catch on the attachments and it pulls uncomfortably like a bobby pin that's caught a stray hair in the wrong way. I have to use a special brush designed not to catch and pull on the extension attachment points. They're supposed to last 2-4 months; I'm not sure if I'll last that long.

According to Brian, actresses and performers these days rarely are photographed without some type of hair extensions, whether "permanent" like mine, or clip-ons. That includes models in hair product commercials! (Just as it's perfectly legal for models in mascara commercials to be wearing several sets of false eyelashes.) I had 6 on each side. Some get as many as 200!

Have you tried hair extensions? If so, how did you like the results? Did it take some time to get used to them?

SJP photo from Elle.com
~

Foulard de la semaine

"Aux pays des épices" Hermès carré, worn entirely un-ironically. I like how these colors work with my navy blazer.

~

Hermès Scarves - Back From the Brink of Fashion Oblivion?

Despite its seemingly ignominious status among les Parisiennes, the Hermès scarf gets the fashionista treatment in this month's Elle magazine, as "16 Style Tastemakers" [?!?] bring their own spin to the classic accessory.

(Thanks to Karen for pointing me to the article!)
~